So the New York Marathon is done and done. It was a killer experience all and all but I would be lying to y'all if I did not tell you I am and was a bit disappointed with my results. I know I know, the whole woah is me routine is lamer then lame and my blog is a space of optimism, sunshine and all that. BUT I am human and I pinky this will not be negative, just honest.
I work hard. Like real hard. I follow my running regime to the T. I follow a strict training regime and listen dutifully to my coach. My weeks are filled with 7-8 work outs and I run 50-70 miles. The past 6 months has seen me battle with obnixious injuries--some quad issues, some shin and calf issues and a big fat cluster eff in the ole right hip. I pushed through all of them. I ignored them as best I could and tried to keep my anxiety at bay.
Fast forward to last weekend...Nov. 5th. We were in NYC. I was feeling effing amazing. My legs had not felt that fresh in I cannot remember the last time. I was nervous but not overly. Nov. 6th, The morning of the race, everything went as planned. Although my tummy was a mess of knots and I did have some gastro issues--alas nothing I need to share here! We gots a little panicked from the ferry to the bus but it was all nerves. The weather was perfect. On the start line, my tummy felt empty. But there was nothing I could do about that now. I set those thoughts aside, hugged myself as always, kissed my biceps, rubbed my ear lobes and jumped three times (been doing this since I was a child as a competitive swimmer). And we were off. My first 16 miles felt good. I was a little slower then pace but I was really hoping to run a negative split so I was confident. The Queenboro bridge was effing tough. Quite an incline and with little decline for recovery. The side/head wind gots you good. But I tried to keep smiling and enjoy every second. From here on out, I had to push hard. At mile 20, I lost the feeling in my feet. from my toes up to my ankles. It was odd and disconcerting. Frightful thoughts raced through my head: do I stop? do I not finish? fortunately or maybe unfortunately, this is never an option for me. you finish what you start. so I kept trucking. My pace band had fallen out of my pocket some time ago but I knew I needed 8 mins miles. I could not keep'em consistent so I turned the face of my garmin away from me, put my head down and decided to just get'er done. I knew my goal time was already out of reach but I could not focus on this. I promised myself that what ever happened I would not be disappointed with my results because I did everything I possibly could to be ready for NY AND the fact that 6 mos ago all my sports health care providers told me the marathon was a far fetched dream that may not happen. well, I showed them didn't I? But the truth of the matter is, I am a tad disappointed by my time because I did do everything I possibly could to prepare. I made new choices like giving up certain things and missing out on certain things and although I would not change this for anything I still wonder why my body couldn't do it!! Am I proud of myself for rocking it best I could? hells yes but I want that PB more then you know. The fire is burning hotter then ever before. After the race, I was buzzed with emotional energy--positive. First person I called was my coach. I could hear the pride in his voice which made my heart smile. After it all set in a bit, I began reasoning with myself. Maybe my 3:29 at Mississauga was a total fluke. Gilly reassured me that running does not work that way. There are no flukes. She reminded me what I said a million times, sometimes its your day and sometimes its not. I made NYC my day but just did not get the time I was hoping for. Disappointment only brings a harder work ethic over here. 5 mins after the race I was like I am done with marathons. 6 hours later I was like well, maybe one more!? haha. I am going to take the next season to work on my short distances. Get the speed up. some goals I through out there to the coach were a fast half-hopefully a sub 1:35 with some pacing help and I would really like to try a tri in the summer.
As in every life situation, we learn. Every marathon I run, I learn more about who I am and what I am about. I am one determined chick. I do not give up easily.
The one thing that has been shocking to me, and in away disappointing, 2 days post race my legs felt fine. Like go for a run, no stiffness or sorenes fine. It goes to show you that a. I am in fricking great shape. and b. (grrrrr) maybe I did not push hard enough Sunday. I have enjoyed two short runs this week where I have felt light and fresh. I have one more week of chilltown then its back at it.
In conclusion, as promised, no negativity here. no siree bob. but honesty..yes ma'am. I love running. I love everything about it and I am going to keep working hard and get me some pb's. New York Marathon-I heart you. The experience was one of a lifetime. I will be recounting the moments within the experience for many days to come.
now, its back at it. off to get my ass kicked by the coach and I cannot wait.